Too low: terrain

Forgive the flight analogy, but it seems to fit. 15 years ago I seemed to be climbing steadily. I was becoming less shy, and the world seemed full of possibilities. Then, in spring 1998 I lost all thrust and stalled, crashing to a point where I could not leave the house. I had had my first panic attacks. 

I managed to become airworthy again, if rickety, and continued my studies. For periods of time, I would climb, stall, and repeat until I graduated early as I just couldn't get the thrust to go on. 

I have wondered if I might ever reach cruising altitude(my potential.) I have continued to make mere repeated, forced touch and go landings often with no gear. As the sparks fly, I wonder if I can recover. I reach out to be social and make friends and something or someone always seems to pull off my wings. I am grounded, try again, repeat... How do I break this cycle? I need loyal, non-judgemental friends, and hugs. Doesn't seem a big ask, but harder than you'd think.

Six am and I cannot sleep. 

While I try, please check out CineDependent.com 

to see the short flight I made today.